Your questions answered by sex and relationships expert Sarah Doherty
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Q: What to do if you have a dry vagina?
A: If you’re having problems with vaginal dryness, it’s worth trying some simple options you can manage yourself before going directly to your GP. It can help if you:
Try using a lubricant or vaginal moisturiser – these can be bought without prescription and give yourself enough time to become sparked up before having sex.
It’s good idea to see your GP for advice if:
– Self help measures aren’t effective for you
– Your symptoms are specifically severe and are interfering with your normal activities
– You have other disruptive symptoms, such as hot flushes and night sweats
A: The vaginal walls may be dry from lack of oestrogen, which helps maintain your natural lubrication. This may cause bleeding during or after sexual intercourse. However there are many solutions that will help. We really recommend Sylk’s Natural plant based Intimate Moisturiser, which works in harmony with your body, it hydrates and soothes vaginal dryness and makes sexual intercourse much bearable.
A: If you are married, or embarking on a new relationship after the end of a marriage, it my have been some time since you last experienced the excitement and anxiety of sex with a new partner. However there are several things to celebrate and look forward to about sex in midlife. For example you have more self-confidence, by this time in your life, we know our bodies, we know what we like and what we don’t like. We defiantly don’t have the bodies we know we once had in our twenties, but we have something a lot stronger. Self – confidence and self-awareness are far sexier than gym toned abs.
A: There is no specific number of times you should have sex and even after 40. You should only have sex if you both feel that you want it at the same time. It’s a common symptom to experience a low sex drive in both men and women due to decreasing levels of oestrogen in women and testosterone in men. When your hormone levels lower it can result in everything from anger, insomnia, feeling emotional a lot, distraction, depression and a low sex drive.
Sarah Doherty, BA (Hons), FdA, PG Dip, MBACP, COSRT (Accred) Relationship counsellor and sex therapist. Since 2009 I have been helping hundreds of couples and individuals to create more satisfying relationships and sexual intimacy.